I Started Writing My Book Two Weeks Ago...

Yes, it is in fact strange, but I decided to begin the project that I have considered for several decades now.  I am going to write a book.  Rest assured, it will not be anything creative or epic.  In fact, it will kind of be like a bunch of episodes of "Seinfeld" back to back.  Let me explain...

I have had a lot of different things happen to me in my life.  Some are very positive, some are very dark, and some are just bizarre.  I have a pretty good memory for things, and can recall details relatively accurately, which is very nice.  Growing up in Houston I frequently commented on my great recall of "useless crap".  I might not be sure how to calculate the volume of a sphere, but I do in  fact remember clearly that the name of the surf shop we went to in South Padre Island in 1978 was Island Style, and that the T-Shirt I bought there was orange.  Go figure...

Anyways... Since I do have reasonable decent recall, and I have had a lot of peculiar things happen in my life, it seems somehow fitting that I should write a book about these experiences.  That that in mind, I began work on "Weird Crap That Has Happened to Me".  I am a bit odd for a male in that I am very sensitive and much more emotional than is normal.  Because of this, my feelings run deep, and when things happen in my life, they are very personal and create a strong impression.  I think that this helps provide me with the ability to recount things that have happened in my life in an entertaining manner.  I know it will be a lot of work, and I may not complete the task before the end of my life, but I am going to work on it.

With this in mind, I offer a peek into the rough draft for one of the stories that I plan to include in the project. Recognize that this is far from a finished product, and so take it and my literary talent with a bag of salt...

No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

                I was attending BYU my freshman year.  I asked a girl named Andrea out on a date to see a movie the following weekend.  I wasn’t terribly interested in her, but I thought it would be fun.  A few days later I was in my Religion class and the very cute gal that sat next to me asked me if I would be her escort to the Heritage Halls Invitational the following weekend.  I was stunned as she would ask me on a date.  That had never happened to me before.  For an instant I was ecstatic, but then I realized that I already had a date that night.  I thought “Forget Andrea, I’m going to the dance with Lisa…” but then my conscience got the better of me and I had to decline, as I had a prior commitment. I was disappointed, but I felt very proud of myself for doing the right thing and living up to my obligation. 
                The following weekend I went over to the residence hall where Andrea lived.  I waited for her for a while but she never came downstairs.  I called up to her room but there was no answer.  I waited for about an hour and finally left and went back to my dorm.   I spoke to her the next day and she told me that she had forgotten that I had asked her out and did not even apologize for standing me up.

I have a new granddaughter.  Her name is Iris Arlene Clyde.  My daughter Aimee son-in-law Matt are the proud parents.  My daughter Christy and my son-in-law Chuck are expecting a  baby girl in October.  My son Jonathan and his wife Olivia are expecting a baby on December 24.  I go from three so six grandchildren in a matter of a few months...

I am not really sure exactly how to react to the knowledge that I will have 6 grandchildren before I reach the age of 50.  Somehow that just does not seem right, but I am so very blessed to have such a wonderful family.  When our first son Carl passed away in August of 1986, I seriously thought I might never have any children.  Though the loss was the single greatest challenge in my life, the blessing that he and our other four children have been has truly been something beyond measure.

Today is exactly 6 months from Christmas Day.  I sent and message to my wife that I wanted to put up the Christmas tree.  The message received no response... Sigh...

I am back on Facebook after a few months hiatus.  I didn't want to miss out of some of the things that I felt like I was.  There are some things that I would rather not know about though... Alas, you can't have it both ways.

My son graduated from Spanish Fork High School.  I now officially have no dependent children, and according to the agreement my wife and I reached in about 1994, I can officially return home to Houston and  end my banishment from my home.  Alas, I love my children and grandchildren more than my home town, so I remain here in the frozen wilderness where I will one day die and be buried behind the shed in the back yard.

Diet Dr. Pepper.  The beverage of choice for most of the free world.  If it was consumed by everyone, I believe there would be world peace and even boring soccer matches could not ruin it.  No offense to those that like soccer.  I just don't care for it.  Those that complain that there is no action in baseball need to have their head examined when they say they really enjoy the fast-paced action of soccer.  Don't get me wrong, I know lots of people love it, but when I went to a match once I waited in line for a hot dog for about an hour and came back and the score was still 0-0.  I guess I really like the man vs man battle between a pitcher and a hitter.  Hitting a baseball is one of the hardest things to do in sports.  Don't believe me?  Ask Michael Jordan.  He was one of the greatest athletes ever, and he could not hit is weight in the minor leagues.

Speaking of sports, what do you think... is bowling a sport?  What about NASCAR?  Badminton?  Curling?    Seems to me that most of those have much in common with chess, which I do not consider a sport.  Don't get me wrong here... I'm not saying that they are easy, or that there is not competition associated with them.  I just don't really consider any of them a sport... just my spin...